I remember it was Christmas of 1994.

The year I found out Santa Claus isn’t real.
Well, at least not the big guy in a red suit. I think somehow, I’ve realized the dreadful truth long before I was ready to let go of a childhood certainty.

After all, it wasn’t just all about the big guy in a red suit. It was the magic of my Christmas. Having that dreadful feeling of finding out the truth I kept pushing at the back of my head, I was surprised that Christmas morning to see something bulging from my “santa socks” (which was actually my papa’s old tattered gray socks). It was a gift from Santa. It was a little bit late that year but I sighed a deep relief. There I saw a cheap bag that had a “pretty mermaid” stamped on its plastic buckle. A suspicious looking mermaid, supposedly, Ariel with Orange hair was printed on the flap.

I was sorely disappointed. After so many years of expensive chocolates, beautiful fairytale storybooks and hard bounds, expensive toys and toy sleighs, Santa got economical that Christmas of 1994.

So of course, I found out the truth. Or better yet, I accepted the truth.

I also found out that my Ate Hazel, who was also just a kid then learned about that awful truth, a little earlier than I did. Although brokenhearted herself, she was determined to save me from finding out too soon and giving me another year to savor the magic. With her meager allowance, she bought my pretty mermaid bag... and gave me one of my most cherished childhood Christmas memories.

It was Christmas of 1994 when I found out that Santa isn’t real.

Ironically, it was also that year I got the most cherished gift from “Santa”. =)

I LOVE YOU TETEL. I always have the best memories with you.

Happy Birthday!

My Life officialy starts next week.

I miss Home

...That's because HOME is where your FAMILY is.

pssst, little girl...

You, sweetie, definitely raises the cringeworthy bar.

If only you were my sister, or even my best friend.

I would tell you how stupid you are acting right now.

And how people snicker behind your back with your misplaced pride while cheering you on in your face.

But then…I think you know that.

And I have a nagging suspicion…that’s exactly how you want it to be.

Goodness. I'm a hopeless bag addict. Just spent the lat 3 hours surfing the net for bags, bags, bags.

Watched 500 Days of Summer and liked it. I really did. Paolo liked it too, I think. After all, he got an extra 1 hour or so doze-off time. Hopeless. Anyway, It’s refreshing to watch a sorta-love story that doesn’t revolve on two perfect people living perfect lives who surprisingly cannot find their match amidst all their nauseating perfection. The characters are as normal if not as mundane as two people can get. Makes you realize amidst the dullness in everyone, we all have a story or two to share.

I have a new crush. JGL looks like a young Heath Ledger. I miss him. *Sigh. He used to rank second to Brad Renfro in my high school heart.

NO to sisig!!!

Paolo and I will be left alone for a week starting tonight. Our “yaya” Lulu is going home for a short vacay. I’ve decided on trying to be at my most domesticated (and determined) self these coming days. That means brown bagging our lunch, no take-outs, no dining out for a week and preparing everything by me. That’s not all either; I plan to take this opportunity to prepare everything healthy. I feel like our diet these days can be summed up as college dorm menu. Pao and I are both enablers. We love food as much as each other, I suspect. I am writing all of these down so I’ll be tied down and my sisters can ask me and follow up on this lofty endeavor.

So help me, God.

Egad! Life had been so crazy busy these past few days. I felt like I’m being pulled out from all different directions. I just woke up one day realizing its November already and we’re on the last quarter.

*Sigh. I don’t think people realize how I can be so busy when I don’t really have a schedule to follow. But in reality, that actually makes it doubly hard. Specially that I don’t really have a concept of time management. How I wish I’m crazy busy doing things that I love, not things I need to do. I just do what I have to do and it doesn’t help that I can be such a perfectionist, finishing everything up to its last dot. I did try following a schedule and then suddenly I get orders, or requests from people and all prudence, suddenly thrown in the wind.

I can’t wait for December.