CHOOSE YOUR BATTLES.

I got into a conversation with my mom about work.

I then thought about my last stint in the corporate world. I used to be really high-strung and emotional. I got affected with people having a problem with me or anything that had to do with me. Then I married my very laid-back and patient husband who has a job that has an average of two years turnover (that means people resign after two years) because of the stress and pressure and I learned so much from him. It’s always a wonder for me that Pao never gets on a serious tiff in the office even if he handles such gigantic responsibility. I'm working on learning that.

I thought about my old job in this I.T. Company, I got in because I was highly recommended by a friend and a past co-officer in PJMA back in our College days. Consequently, this friend became our boss in the department which was a major issue back then because he was young and was relatively new with new ideas.
Just like in any organization, those who rock the boat, who challenge the old system, are the first ones thrown out and fed to the sharks.

I got in on the wrong foot from the start because people didn’t really like this guy who recommended me. I guess by association and preconceived notion, it was an uphill for me from then to prove myself. It was a great first job, I loved my work and my responsibilities. Being a UP Orcom graduate, I lived for Client presentations. I loved coming up with new ways, sometimes more elaborate and even dramatic ways to present. I remember feeling so at ease with my work, how I was so trained for that line of job in my four years in college. I never had problems with my clients. But as much as I loved my job I remember being so stressed over the office politics and what people thought.

Being the snooty brat that I was back then, I kept asking myself why I was putting myself in that situation when I didn’t really need that job. Maybe it was an excuse for feeling so out of my zone for the first time in my life. I realized you can never win when you are up against people’s prejudice.

Now, looking back, all I can think of is goodness, how young I was. If only I knew then, what I know now, I would have made an effort to eschew myself from so much unnecessary dramas. Truth of the matter is: any organization will always be high school, no matter how many times you remind yourselves that you are adults.

There will always be people who will like you and will hate you no matter what. It’s the way of the world. I personally believe the only way you can know for sure if you should be concerned is through the quality of relationships you have with these people.

Are these people who hate you, your family or close friends? If yes, then something must be seriously wrong with you and a personality change is in order. But really, if these people who hate you are barely part of your world, people who you rarely talk with and only see through facebook, or pass by at work or through office meetings, or people you are required to work with …then it really shouldn’t matter.
Just deliver the goods the best way you can. What they think about you is really none of your business. Everything after all, is open for interpretation. As I always say, sometimes reality is relative. It depends on what angle you are looking at it.

Now, I rarely deal with these kinds of people in my line of work, one thing I love most about my business. Sure, I do get the occasional irate clients---this happens with Corporate accounts and bulk orders—no surprise there. But I learned not to take things personally, not to believe everything and just keep things light. I have learned to detach myself and my emotions and just do what I gotta do. I should be more sensitive now since my line of work is very personal, these are my own designs but ironically, I am more detached with the emotional aspect. Something that I worked on (and still working on) for the last few years.

I argue and compromise, I negotiate and disagree, I give in and stand my ground. But at the end of the day, it’s done and over with---I am back to MY world and those who I want to include in it.